Merry Christmas

Well another Christmas down in the books! It's not a Christmas I care to relive either--sadly enough. We missed Midnight Mass because of the snow and I think that had a huge effect on me/us! We missed the opportunity to reflect on the year and celebrate the reason for the season.

I have been reading other blogs for months and have seen people post about how hard the holidays are and I just never felt that way--until Christmas morning. It hit me like a ton of bricks--while everyone was opening gifts. It was a combination of things that morning but it just broke my heart that we are not any further along then we were at this time last year. Christmas day was one year ago to the day that we found out our IVF didn't work. After 4 long years of infertility, we are in the adoption pool and waiting as patiently as we can and I have a sister (who is also my best friend) who is becoming a mom in a few short months. All that with the 10+ inches of snow was "The Perfect Storm" for my emotions.

We decided it was best to be at home because the roads were terrible and I was not a fun person to be around that day--so we spent the day napping and watching t.v. and had cereal for dinner!

After much discussion we decided that we hope we don't have another Christmas like that--feelings of sadness instead of rejoicing. So we decided we will travel to someplace warm next year over Christmas if we haven't been placed with a baby :)

Then a sign from God came last night. I feel asleep last night early (like 9 p.m.) while I was watching the early news. I woke up at 10:10 and was awake enough to change to the other news channel just in time for the beginning of a news story. The story was about a couple that had a "Christmas Miracle". They got a phone call last week--they had been picked for adoption. They brought home their son this weekend. This couple went through our agency and we have seen them speak!
Coincidence??? NOPE--Thank you God for a sign. A sign of hope. I needed it. I was feeling hopeless this holiday!