We got back from Chicago last Tuesday. We had a great time. We caught a baseball game, saw two Pearl Jam concerts and caught up with a friend I hadn't seen in a long time. It had been over a year since we had taken a vacation together--just the two of us. The vacation came at a perfect time. We needed to get away and we had an amazing time.
Waiting sucks about as much as Monday's suck. We have only been waiting on the adoption list since April but it feels like we have been waiting for much longer. We have been waiting to become parents for over 3 1/2 years. It is hard and frustrating. Especially because I went to a baby shower this weekend (should have stayed home). Between people taking pregnancy for granted and someone telling me "if you want something bad enough it will happen" it was a pretty crappy time. If I was smart I would have started drinking heavily but I couldn't trust my mouth and since it was a couple shower for a co-worker I just stayed quiet and tried to take my mind to a far away place (which is hard to do with pink all over the place and a pregnant belly staring at you). I survived the baby shower but do think it affected my mood yesterday. I pretty much slept the entire afternoon/evening. Cullen said I was like a bear in hibernation...got up to eat, use the restroom and would take another nap. I guess if you can't deal with the pain the best thing to do is sleep! :) At Mass yesterday our best friends little boy feel asleep in my arms and I have to say I long for the days when our baby will sleep in our arms. I know it will happen and I have to remain positive and I will but as they say--some days are better than others!
Cullen said a very sweet thing to me yesterday--"you know we may want other things in our life but if that doesn't happen I am happy that you are in my life and that is enough for me". I agree and as always I am very thankful that I have a wonderful and supportive husband.
Here is to a good week and if anything we have a 3 day weekend coming up....because of Labor Day (oh great another pregnancy/baby word that I have to hear--kidding!)
A picture of Eddie Vedder and of us at the baseball game!
i'm glad you had such a nice and well deserved vacation! :)
ReplyDeleteyuck....i'm sorry people said such insensitive and stupid things to you and i'm especially sorry you had to attend a baby shower. :( those can be so incredibly difficult.....
we began our wait in april of 2008.....by August i was feeling like it was NEVER going to happen. the waiting process is just so hard.....there's nothing about it that's easy or "fun"......we were matched in November, but it felt like we had been waiting years! i just want you to know that you're not alone in the way you are feeling and needing to protect yourself. we all cope in the best ways we know how and i can't wait for you to hold your sleeping baby in your arms as well. :)
keep on hanging in there!